PastorGary Posted October 1, 2013 Report Share Posted October 1, 2013 Tired of constantly being broke & stuck in an unhappy marriage, a younghusband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance policyon his wife with himself as the beneficiary, and then arranging to have herkilled. A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side underworldfigure who went by the name of 'Artie.' Artie explained to the husband that hisgoing price for snuffing out a spouse was $5,000.The husband said he was willing to pay that amount, but that he wouldn't haveany cash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money. Artieinsisted on being paid at least something up front, so the man opened hiswallet, displaying the single dollar bill that rested inside. Artie sighed,rolled his eyes, & reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar as down payment forthe dirty deed. A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local WalmartSuper Store. There, he surprised her in the produce department &proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands. As the poor unsuspecting womandrew her last breath & slumped to the floor, the manager of the producedepartment stumbled unexpectedly onto the murder scene. Unwilling to leave anyliving witnesses behind, ol' Artie had no choice but to strangle the producemanager as well. However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the hiddensecurity cameras & observed by the store's security guard, who immediatelycalled the police. Artie was caught and arrested before he could even leave thestore. Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the wholesordid plan, including his unusual financial arrangements with the haplesshusband who was also quickly arrested. The next day in theNewspaper, the headline declared... 'ARTIE CHOKES 2 for $1.00 at WALMART'[ Hey I didn't write this, I'm just passing it on... ] Logan5 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deputycrawford Posted May 16, 2014 Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 I don't care who you are, now that's funny right there. Jerry Sean1989 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PastorGary Posted May 16, 2014 Author Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danrig Posted January 19, 2016 Report Share Posted January 19, 2016 Ohhhhh good grief..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fenriswolf039 Posted January 24, 2016 Report Share Posted January 24, 2016 http://zero3nine.com/files/rimshot.gif Sean1989 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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