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5 AM Central Time, Saturday, January 26 - 14 degrees below zero with wind chill at 27 below zero. Colder at my Midwest location than in Fort Yukon, Alaska. Several years ago, the morning air temperature was 27 degrees below - a lady went out to her car to go to work, saw that one tire looked a little soft - kicked it and it 'broke'. It is so cold here that Scotsmen in the area are starting to wear pants. I tried to take the garbage out, but it didn't want to go. Pet stores here are starting to sell Penguins. Police told a robber to freeze - and he did. Mail delivery persons are watching out for dogs AND Polar Bears. It is so cold here that hitchhikers are holding up pictures of thumbs... Now, where did I put my golf clubs?